Did someone yell fire?

Well today has been most interesting. And it's only half over!!

So I'm sitting in the movie theater, and all of a sudden I smell smoke. Actual smoke!

This is very disconcerting knowing that there is a large raging forest fire in the area, and it is now apparently close enough for the smell to seep into the movie theater.

Yes I had a teensy panic attack, but that didn't stop me from finishing the new Indiana Jones movie. Which is pretty good by the way. Last Crusade was better though.

I figured if there was an inferno blazing around us, someone would have at least stopped the movie, and evacuated us no?

Anyway, upon exiting, into the bright sunshine, I was astonished to see huge billows of smoke rising over the mountains. Planes were flying overhead to grab water from the nearest lake 3 miles away.

The sense of urgency was even more pronounced by a lone firetruck blaring it's siren directly behind our car, damn near giving me a heart attack, and causing me to jump a good 4 feet into the air, like I was in some sort of ejector seat.

Not sure how necessary that really was, especially considering what happened next.

Sirens blaring the truck goes speeding past us up the hill at about, oh say, 10 miles an hour. This struck me as funny. Obviously they need to rush to the fire, but the heavy truck couldn't make it up the steep hill fast enough. Kinda like my car, the Black Beast actually. Even funnier, was that cars were whizzing past the truck at about 50 miles an hour.

The fire is close enough now, that the air smells like a giant bbq, either that or smoked Gouda. I can't decide. The fact that I'm hungry, and have been thinking about smoked cheese since the movie, may or may not be a factor.

There isn't an official report yet on how the fire started, but of course I've heard plenty of rumors. One such rumor was that a routine burn got out of control.

Not surprising if this was the case, as I have seen too many instances of this happening in my neighborhood alone.

Honestly, people, how do you not know that burning in windy weather in the mountains will lead to bad things?

In fact controlled burns should be banned altogether in the mountains. I don't understand why no one with law making authority can see that burning fires, on purpose, in the mountains, with lots of trees, which are very flammable, could be considered a hazard.

It really isn't difficult to understand folks. Should you need more help, please refer to a previous post of mine here for more education, I mean information.


Here's another kicker. We are currently trying to get homeowners insurance. For most people this is as easy as apple pie. For us mountain folk, not so much. Every year we get dropped due to the fact that we live amongst the trees and therefore in a fire hazard.

Finally, yesterday we signed the prospective new home owners insurance papers, hoping, praying that we will be approved.

Um, today? With this fire in our area? That has been declared a state of emergency by the Terminator himself? Well ... I'm guessing Farmers Insurance won't approve us now. What do you think?

As it is now, the fire is actually south of where I live, but if the wind changes, I'm packing up the cats and heading out of here.

I don't even want to begin to imagine the hugenormous traffic jam there will be to get out of the mountains.

I for one intend to beat the rush.

Everything you wanted to know about me, but where afraid to ask

I know you all are dying to know more about me. Don't be shy. I know it's true.

Well, you are in luck. As it happens, I am one of my favorite, not to mention easiest subjects to talk about ... so, as a good gesture, I am going to post this here tag. Which is, as you may have guessed, all about ME.

Lest you mistake that I'm actually popular or something, I have to admit, I stole this tag off Lady Banana's site. But don't worry it's okay, she said I could. Honest.

1. Last movie you saw in a theater?

The Spiderwick Chronicals.

2. What book are you reading?

A walk in the Woods by Bill Bryson. Excellent read by the way. Recommended by another blogger after reading my backpacking post.

3. Favorite board game?

Trivial Pursuit. Cause I love useless facts and looking smart.

4. Favorite magazine?
I don't really read magazines, since I've discovered the internet. But one that I always read in the bathroom is Fine Cooking.

5. Favorite smells?

New tires, chocolate, baking, bacon.

6. Favorite sounds?

The flowing creek in my backyard, waterfalls, and rain.

7. Worst feeling in the world?

So far that I know of, vertigo, headaches, and cramps.

8. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up?

D'Artagnan (my cat) stop hitting me!

9. Favorite fast food place?

Depends on what I want. If it's a milkshake then Jack in the Box, Fries, McDonalds, Hamburger Carls Jr., Mexican Taco Bell.

10. Future child’s name?

Emily and Madison. Yes I will have girls. I insist on it.

11. Finish this statement. “If I had lot of money I’d….?

Travel, Buy another home closer to family and friends, and finish school.

12. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?

Do my cats count?

13. Storms - cool or scary?

Can be very scary if wind is involved. And lightening. I live near too many trees.

14. Favorite drink?

Apple Juice, Orange Juice, Hot chocolate, and coke. What? I don't do well with favorites. I have lot of them. I also don't do well with decisions.

15. Finish this statement, “If I had the time I would….”?

Not sure, since I actually have a lot of time, but don't use it wisely. I should change the statement to say..."If I had a ton of determination, or is it willpower, or maybe it's focus, I would...

Now I bet you are wondering what I'm going to say now aren't you? Well let's see if I had all that I would write a book, and finish school.

16. Do you eat the stems on broccoli?

Absolutely NOT! They're icky.

17. If you could dye your hair any color, what would be your choice?

Since I already do that, here's a run down of the color choices for the next 3 months (that's how long it lasts), Blond on top, hot pink below, 2 different purples below that, and dark brown underneath, and in the back. Otherwise known as Rainbow Bright.

18. Name all the different cities/towns you’ve lived in?

Oh my gosh, we could be here all day. Oh well here goes...Macon, San Diego, Cupertino, Sunnyvale, Mountain View, Milpitas, San Jose, El Granada ... There are more, but really, I'm sure you're bored by now.

19. Favorite sports to watch?

I don't.

20. One nice thing about the person who sent this to you?

No one sent this to me. I stole it. Sort of. But I got this from Lady Banana's site, who is really cool, and if you want to read a good, and entertaining blog head over here.

21. What’s under your bed?

Cats and I think handcuffs. Kidding about the handcuffs. I think.

22. Would you like to be born as yourself again?

I think so, but I would want a flatter stomach, different jaw structure so I don't look like a horse or ape when smiling, and I would do a few things differently.

23. Morning person, or night owl?

Given my propensity for staying up til 2 or 3, I'd say night owl. Or I suppose I could be considered a morning person. Very early morning that is.

24. Over easy, or sunny side up?

Scrambled!

25. Favorite place to relax?

In my pool or creek, on the couch with my laptop, or bed. Oh wait, just one place?

26. Favorite pie?

Banana Cream or make that chocolate cream or Boston Cream or...

27. Favorite ice cream flavor?

First of all, how the heck do I pick just one? Baskin Robbins alone has over 31 flavors. Considering ice cream is probably my favorite dessert, picking one flavor is asking a lot! I can't even do that when I order it. I always get two flavors. Ugh. Okay. ONE of my favorites is Chocolate and Peanut Butter. Delish!

28. Of all the people you tagged this to, who’s most likely to respond first?
Since I wasn't tagged in the first place, I don't feel I should tag someone else..so I'll do what Lady Banana did, and whoever wants to take this tag can...Enjoy!

Tick Mountain

If you are a frequent visitor to my blog, you are likely already aware of my deep aversion towards ticks. That is, if you actually read the posts.

If you just come by for the spectacular scenery, and or Entrecard drop, then you probably don't realize how much I hate them. Then again, you probably aren't reading this, so it really doesn't matter.

If you are new to the area however, and stopped by because of my outstanding blog name and or avatar (for those social networking users) then, Hi there and welcome! By the way ticks scare the bejeebers out of me!

Just so you know.

Anyhoo, this little phobia of mine has become quite dangerous and is very likely to get me into trouble sometime. Let me give you an example of what I mean.

Last summer I was driving to the grocery store. Earlier that day, I had been on a hike, and as it was getting cool out, I had put on a black sweatshirt (the color is important here).

About halfway to the store, I am stopped at a stop sign and notice something moving on the sleeve of my sweatshirt.

As I start driving again, I simultaneously inspect my sleeve. Big mistake! It was a tick. Just one lone tick, making it's way down my arm, along my black sweatshirt.

Black.

Ticks are also black.

Do you know what went through my mind after I finished screaming? Yes I did scream. Loudly.

I kept thinking how many other ticks were on me, that I couldn't see because they blended into my black sweatshirt. Not only that, but where did the first tick come from? My neck? My hair? My shirt? My pants?

The possibilities were endless.

I was positively freaking out. Shudders, screams, much flailing of the arms, hyperventilating, and rising panic all ensued, at the thought of the possible hordes of ticks dispersed along my body.

And all this was happening while I driving on a two lane, windy, mountain road.

As I tried to brush the phantom ticks off me, I would swerve into the oncoming traffic, but luckily pull out, just before a car sped past.

Sensing imminent danger. I hastily spun my car around, and sped home as fast as I could. Once there, I ran into the house, shedding clothes along the way, and jumped into the shower.

After a good, thorough scrubbing and inspection, I was convinced that it was safe to leave the confines of the shower, and put clean clothes on. I never went back to the store that night, as I was sure my car was infested with those bloodsuckers.

All that commotion for ONE tick.

And that? Wasn't the worst episode. Allow me to share just what happened on the night of the scariest tick moment of my life.

The scariest tick moment of my life happened when my husband and I were very first dating.

Since we were a new couple, we did wild and crazy things, such as staying up late on weeknights, eat junk food, and go for late night bike rides and hikes.

As usual, one night after work, I made my way over to his place for dinner. It was late, since those were the days when I worked until almost nine every night.

Sometime after dinner, we decided it would be fun to go on a late night hike. There was a nice hiking mountain right near his house, so we drove up there.

Technically, I don't think you are supposed to hike there at night. Especially at 11 pm, but what the heck. Rules were made to be broken right?

The view was spectacular.

The weather comfortable.

The trails, thin and grassy. That should have been my first clue. Long grassy weeds in the hills? Tick city.

Just so you know, I have been on hundreds of hikes, in all kinds of terrain, and I have never once picked up a tick. Never. Ticks were the absolute furthest thing from my mind.

Our walk was lovely, but was stopped short when I felt something crawling up my leg. As I bent down to brush it off, I noticed it was a tick.

Trying to be cool, in front of my relatively new boyfriend, I tried to minimize my panic and flailing arms as I furiously checked myself for more.

When I noticed yet another one, all hell broke loose.

Obviously I didn't mean to shriek so loudly. But, I just couldn't help it. I flew towards the car, and started a massive inspection.

My boyfriend somewhat alarmed by my loss of composure/coolness, followed at a more sedate pace.

The more we inspected me, the more ticks we found.

Clothes started flying off of at a rapid pace. Ticks were hiding in every nook and cranny. Apparently they like armpits.

Soon I was .... well naked. As in buck.

I was still furiously inspecting my body, when I noticed the bright police lights shining in my direction.

Oh dear god.

I flew into the car, but was too scared of my clothes, to cover myself up, so I just huddled with my arms crossed over me, as best I could in the front seat, with the cop light beaming at about a million watts into the car.

I can only imagine what our little scenario looked like. A young couple in the mountains late at night, near a parked car, the woman completely naked. The only odd part would be the fact that my boyfriend was fully clothed, and we were standing outside the car.

At any rate, he managed to talk to the cop and convince him nothing untoward was going on. In exchange for not getting written up for trespassing, and or indecent exposure, we were told to leave. Which we gladly did.

We drove the short distance home, but I was still huddled in the front seat without a stitch of clothes on, as we made our way down the city streets and stopped at all red lights.

Even in my tick panic mode, I was still worried about the best way to cover my stomach so it didn't look too flabby. Some things never change.

Back at his house, I ran from the car to the bathroom at top speeds, lest his roommate and or a passing neighbor saw my nekked self.

Another furiously long shower, and I was deemed to be tick free.

That was almost 3 years ago, and despite the episode last summer, I am actually getting better now, that I live among the little buggers on a daily basis.

Just the other day, I found one, lodged in my jugular.

I really feel like I'm improving.

After all, I only screamed once, and hyperventilated maybe twice ...

Bushwood here we come!

So my husband and I did the unthinkable today. If you haven't guessed from the title already, let me back up a bit, and tell you what exactly led us to this drastic action.

The truth of the matter is, as much as we enjoy each other's company, we are actually quite lonely. Since moving to the mountains a little over two years ago, we have found that our social life has dwindled down to absolutely nothing. This is largely due to the fact that friends and family do not care to make the long windy drive to our house. We in turn are tired of driving over the hill everyday, for work, so we don't visit them all that often either.

In order to have the kind of social interaction that will keep us from becoming hermits,we need to either move back home to the big city, or make friends up here.

This is where we run into a little problem. You may not realize this, what with me being so overly free spoken in this blog, but I am extremely shy in person. I do not go out of my way to introduce myself and make friends. Never did learn that particular social grace. My husband? Is the same way. If not worse.

Here's part of the problem. This is our town. The whole town. Downtown. The mecca of where we live. Everything happens right here.




One street. Not too exciting, especially when the bulk of the stores are hardware and real estate related.

However, I can't complain too much because we have this,





and this,



practically in our backyard.

So moving is out of the question.

I guess it's time to make friends.

Given there aren't many opportunities in the immediate vicinity, in which to meet the local young population, (I mean how can we? We don't know where they hang. It's not at the grocery store, the gas station or coffee shop. Believe me. I've looked. )we chose the only option left to us.

What did we do?

Why we joined a country club of course.



Yep that's right next week we will be taking our first ever golf lesson, and swing with the best of them.

Now I have to get used to wearing plaid and saddle shoes.

I just hope I get to meet Judge Smails.

Be the ball Danny...

I think weird thoughts

Sometimes when I'm not paying attention- which is actually quite a lot- my brain will drift into various directions. Usually at times like this, strange and ponderous musings will pop into my head unannounced and completely unexpected. Some of which actually frighten me.

I guess it comes with the territory, being as neurotic as I am, and since this is a neurotic blog, well I'd thought I'd share some thoughts with you.

Plus I figure someone out there reading this post (Hi Michael!), might actually have an answer, thus eliminating the need for me to do any actual research into the subjects at hand. Despite the fact that I'm the queen of useless knowlege, I can in fact, be quite lazy at times.


I'll start off with the scariest first ...

What ever happened to Mr. Belevedere? As in the show. I know the man himself has long since passed away, but I really want to know why the show isn't on anymore. Even for me, this question is so out in left field, I don't know what to do with it. I have no idea why I care, but I do know that now I have a strong hankering to watch the series.





I'll admit as a kid, I enjoyed watching it when it was on, but gee whiz I haven't seen it since I was about 10 years old. And honestly? I haven't thought about it since. Until about 2 weeks ago. Then I couldn't get it out of my head. I must see Mr. Belevedere!! This just makes no logical sense.

Speaking of butler shows, I also really enjoyed Benson. Sadly this show has disappeared from the airwaves as well. Yes I realize it aired in the late 70's/early 80's, but it was a damn fine show that needs to be brought back in reruns. Benson rocked people. He was always good for a chuckle or two with his snappy comebacks.

Come to think of it, I also really liked Niles from the Nanny, and Lurch from the Addams Family. For some reason Lurch was always my favorite, even though his speaking skills were less than stellar.

Oh great, I wonder if this means I have a butler fetish?





Just what was the deal with culottes? And why are they spelled so weird? (And why, when I looked them up on Google images did I get some porn sites? Can't say I was aware that culottes were so kinky. )

Now normally I embrace new fashions. but thank god I wasn't around when this one came to style, because frankly? They are FUGLY!




And what exactly are they? Shorts? A skirt? What? I guess what bothers me the most is their indecisive nature. I have enough trouble making decisions, I don't need my clothes to be indecisive too. And just why am I writing in italics? I can't seem to get my regular font back.

Why are some banana's impossible to open? This is actually a ponderous question, I just really want to know. It just doesn't make sense, because they actually have a handle. Yet some are so resistant to being opened, that I end up squishing the top. This is turn, breaks the peel in various sections, but does not actually open it. After several increasingly frantic attempts at pulling the handle, the darn thing still won't open, and all you have is a mess of banana oooz that has leaked out, from between the cracks. So very frustrating. Not to mention unappetizing when all is said and done.


Do horses sit down? Honestly don't they get tired of standing? I know I do. I tried to recall if I've ever seen a horse relaxing, and I can't say that I have. I have however seen them laying on the ground from time to time, but ... well you know, that's never a good thing.

I know they can sit down, because I've seen them do it on TV.



Apparently they can play ping pong, chess, and talk on the phone too, but do they sit?

Seriously though, most animals do have the ability to sit down, and will do so, when they feel like it. (Can you tell I'm a bit obsessed with this? ) I've seen cows do it. Giraffes. Dogs, cats, even iguana's. So what's the deal with horses? I'm guessing all that weight they carry around can't be very good for their back, and who wants to sleep standing up? That just seems like bad designing to me.

And last but certainly not least,

Why in the world do I always feel compelled to say thank you to the cop that pulled me over and gave me a ticket? It's like I want to be rude, or ignore them, but when they hand me the ticket and ask me sign, I always say a bight and cheery Thank you! The worst part is, I can't not do it.

WTF is up with that?