Prince Harry comes back home

Just read the article.

I have to say that was quick stint. But not surprising. I didn't think the British Government would want him fooling around with weapons and war for too long.

War is dangerous enough for regular people, put a Prince out there and it's amazing he wasn't assassinated straight away.

Still though, he fought for his country as long as he could. Good for him. (See I'm less cynical today). :)

Justine Timberlake gyrates in a speedo?

Umm....

Can I just say, Ick.

Justine Timberlake? Ewww.

Speedo? Yuck.

Add the two together?

Scary.

Just my two cents..

If you are curious, you can see a snippet in the trailer for his new movie The Love Guru below...

I'm actually going to have to see this movie as it stars Mike Meyers and looks pretty funny.

Okay One More Then I'll Stop..

Why am I posting again? Because I'm under the delusion that the whole world wants to read about every little thought that enters my brain. Not true? Too bad.

Anyway I've been wanting to start a post like this for while, and will post every Thursday under the appropriately titled Thursday's Temper Tantrums.

Yes folks, this post or posts as the case may be, will be about all the things that I don't like, piss me off, and/or irritate me. In a word, things I hate.

And the first post is dedicated to a furry black and white creature, commonly known as a skunk. Oh yes Pepe Le Pew I'm talking to you.

They aren't dead ones either. Sadly, these are repeat performers. The skunks in question have an obsessive affinity for perfuming our neighborhood, and sometimes our house, with their pungent aroma.

I frequently, like tonight for instance, will be sitting on the couch minding my own business when the first nauseating wave hits me. I sniff. I gag. I can't breath. Oh dear god no. Not another skunk. Oh the foulness of it all. Now we will have to move into a hotel for the night, because the smell will keep me up gasping for air.

Okay I exaggerate. A little. I will stay up gasping for air, but we won't go to a hotel. I'm not that bad, though don't think I haven't threatened to do just that when we had a skunk take up residence, and spray his lovely scent all up under the house.

That smell? Does not go away. It takes days. And I honestly almost slept in the car.

OMG I don't believe what I just did!

I ran. Me. Ran. Amazing.

It all started this afternoon. My husband and I have been somewhat stir crazy lately, as we tend to find ourselves sitting at home staring at computers all day. Him working, and me fooling around on the internet. It's amazing how fast time goes, when you are sucked into the cyber world.

Anyway around 5:00 we decided to take a petite hike up the road to the boy scout camp. It's a very nice place with lovely trails along the creek and never crowded. Not actually sure we are supposed to be there, since it is a camp, but we haven't been kicked out yet.

We haven't been on a hike yet this year, and as I've gained some weight and let my body conform to the couch, I have to admit it was a bit challenging at first. I huffed and puffed all the way up the trail, which embarrassingly wasn't very steep, nevertheless it was a bit rough on me. Not so for the hubby who is an ex triathlete. Even though he hasn't competed in years, he charged on ahead without breaking a sweat, while I poked along behind, pretending that my slowness was attributed to having to stop and admire the scenery. Which it was. Sort of.

Well we got to the top and turned around to head back, and me in my infinite wisdom, decided it might be fun to run back. Hmmm...My body is not made for this sort of activity. And it certainly isn't used to heavy exercise anymore.

There I was wobbling and jiggling all the way down the trail. Notice it was downhill see how smart I am? I made it quite far actually. Even though I couldn't breath, and was sure I was going to collapse, I pressed on. Further and further I ran, and then, the road betrayed me, and started to go uphill. That's when I stopped. My poor body had been abused enough. We walked the rest of the way home.

Much to my surprise once we got home I felt great. Never been more relaxed. Started to think I might like this sort of thing. A bit of exercise is just what the doctor ordered. I'm starting a new regime tomorrow, we will run everyday, and I will loose weight and get fit, be relaxed, feel good, and...

Now? I can't freaking walk. My legs are so sore from this afternoon's stupidity.

Why the hell did I think it was a good idea to run?

Prince Harry fighting in Afghanistan?

Umm....I'm not so sure. I know this sounds positively cynical, but come on people. Do you really think his royal highness is out there brandishing a machine gun (or whatever weapon they give) and fighting the front lines like the articles claim? The heir to the royal British throne? Well third on the list but still. He's a successor. Seems strange he'd be allowed to join the military to fight, what with the potential of dying and all.

Personally, I just wonder if it's all show. You know like a publicity stunt. A way to keep up his image. He has to do that once in awhile. Throw a few bones out to the public, make him look good. Dress him up in uniform, take a few pictures in Afghanistan to make it look authentic. Whatever it takes. You don't have to have seen Wag the Dog, to know how easy it is for the media to fool the public.

However, I do realize he is from Britain and not America, so maybe they have a higher sense of duty and obligation towards their country than our own government does, and actually believe it's an honor to fight for their country and risk dying.

I don't support the war, however if the Prince is out there fighting for us, then I have to hand it to him, because you can bet we would never see one of our government leaders out on the front lines fighting for America. Which is especially ironic, since they started the damn war in the first place. But I digress...

So, Prince Harry if you're out there fighting in this terrible war, and I say this will all honesty, I thank you for your bravery, and applaud your integrity!

Starbucks closing causes concern...

I've been seeing this headline for 2 days now. They are closing for like 3 hours. Hardly newsworthy.

I love Starbucks as much as the next person, but I'm not going to cry into my hot chocolate over this headline.

People? Maybe you have forgotten seeing as there is a Starbucks literally on every corner, but...

THERE ARE OTHER COFFEE SHOPS. GET OVER IT.

Beverly Hillbillies...

Since I just posted about what my house is like, I thought it would be fun, to show it instead of try to describe it. It really is hard to describe our taste. I understand it isn't for everyone. We tend to go overboard. I think my mother almost fainted when she first saw it. But the good news is, we are both this way, so it works out fine. Notice too, the before pictures are not of our furniture nor decor they were taken before we moved in.

Take a look... if you can get past the mess that is...

Here is the kitchen before we got to it. See how pristine, white and sterile it looks? Not unlike a hospital...Notice also the big tower in the middle of the kitchen which was a broom closet!

Here's what we did to it...Notice the bright colors? Notice too the absence of the tower? Yep my husband chopped that sucker down! Btw he did all the work himself. Very talented.

Here is the living room before. The walls are actually some kind of teal/blueish color.

This isn't the same view as the after picture, but it's the only one I have so It will have to do. One gets the general idea I think...

And here is our interpretation... Much more suitable for us. We obviously aren't traditional.

And again....

Other wall of living room with the fireplace/stove before us.....

And here's ours. A little different huh?

See what I mean? Kinda like Disneyland...

Oh give me a home....

I saw this little questionnaire online somewhere and thought it would be fun to post my answers. Of course if anyone reads this blog feel free to comment with your own answers. But for now here's what I have to say....


1.Which room in your home best represents your personality?

My office/den. I designed it exactly the way I wanted it. It has shelves for all my books (as close to a library as I can get right now) and is painted hot pink and bright orange, with matching curtains, and a nice window seat. My desk is set up against the window that overlooks the trees and creek outside. Not a house in sight just nature. Very cheerful.


2.What are your neighbors like?

Not really sure as they are scary and don't talk. The woman seems nice/normal enough as I see her out in the garden a lot, but the man spends all his time holed up in a little room under the house. I suppose it's supposed to be the mountain house equivalent of a garage. And yes these are the garbage people..

3.What style of home decor suits your taste most(eg.country,modern,ect.)?

Ummm...our house doesn't have a style that you can name. At best it's adventurous/artistic and eclectic. Let's just say it's a cross between Disneyland, Tim Burton, and Alice in Wonderland. One of these days I'll have to post a picture.


4.If money were no object what 3 impractical features would you want your home to include?

A movie theater, a hot tub in a redwood circle with a deck that leads up to the master bath which would include a glass shower (actually this is something we are going to do someday), and an ice cream shop or library can't decide which.

5.What's your least favourite household chore to do?

Hands down, cleaning the bathrooms. Specifically the tub/shower and toilet. Ick!!

A funny thing happened on the way home...

So my husband and I were driving home. Up our mountain road, through the rain and mudslides, and just as we reached the summit, what to our wondering eyes should appear?

Unicycles. Not one, but three.

Huh?

There are so many weird things with this picture. First of all when did unicycles come back in fashion? Sure I've seen them before, but in circuses, and parades. Not on the streets, and certainly not on a mountain road. This particular road I might add is extremely narrow, curvy and uphill. It's a rare site to see a bicycle attempting it and every time I see one, I think how crazy they are. Heck, It's hard enough to chug a car up it, plus it's so narrow, two cars side by side barely fit. So how a unicyclist managed to work their way up is beyond me. I am seriously impressed.

Wow. A quick hop over to Wikipedia, just taught me there is a whole new world I was unaware of. The unicycle world.

Apparently unicycles are very popular. There are even conventions for them. They come in various styles depending on which terrain you ride, and there is even something termed a MUni, which is short for mountain unicycling. You can actually go off road like a mountain biker would. Who knew?

There it is folks a mountain unicycle. Not just for circuses anymore.

Severe Weather Alerts...

We have been having some bad weather out here in California, and I have to admit that storms and I dont' mix very well. My anxiety meter goes into overdrive and I start hyperventalating at the thought of a strong gust of wind. I'm okay with regular rainy weather, maybe some hail, a few strong downpours, no problem.

The anxiety starts when the storm warnings are issued. Mainly the high wind warnings. This, I'm sure stems from when I lived in Georgia during the one year they had a record hurricane season (we managed to cover the alphabet once and had to start over).

Being a California girl, I was not used to extreme weather, nor was I familar with winds so strong, that they blew roofs off shopping centers, fliped airplanes over at the local airport, and reduced the trees into a pile of firewoood right before your eyes.

I spent that whole year glued to the weather channel, and if there was a tornado warning, no rest or peace was had until it was gone. I lived in constant fear of a tornado, sweeping the house away, with me in it, a la Dorthey in the Wizard of Oz.

It is without sadness, that I left Georgia after one year, and despite the unusually active hurricane weather, I'm pleased to report that we had no tornadoes.

Which brings me to the present. I'm back in California, but now I live in the mountains. Bad weather in the mountains is none too pleasant, at least for someone like me. Once again, I'm glued to the weather channel watching every alert, but this time the alerts are flood and high wind warnings, road coslures and fallen trees.

Flooding, I don't personally have to worry about too much. Property wise that is. I have a creek in my backyard, but my house is on stilts high up on the hill, so if the creek gets high enough to flood, that's not really an issue, as our house would have slid down the mountain and floated away long before the water level reached it.

No, It's not the flooding that scares me. It's high winds, falling trees and sometimes, landslides. We actually had a landslide on our property the first year, as half of our upper mountain slithered down, and threatened to take over our propane tank. Since we like heat, hot water and the ability to cook, we decided it best to have the tank moved. This resulted in a huge battle with our propane service, but eventually, we got our way. Since it will cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $30,000 to put up a retaining wall, we now totally ignore the crumbling mountain as it tries to annex the carport.

Just a quick note to the propane company: If you schedule for our tank to be moved after it has been emptied, because propane is a heavy gas, please do not send out a crew member to fill it back up the day before the moving of the tank was to take place, thus rendering it too heavy to move. Sounds simple doesn't it? Well this happened not only once, but three times!

Anyway, It's the trees that scare me the most coupled with high winds. Because I basically live in a forest, there are plenty of trees that can come down on my house and this is a major stress for me. On stormy nights like last night, I lie awake in fear of a redwood crashing through the roof, while my husband snores peacefully without a care in the world.

This may seem neurotic to some, and in a sense it is, but it's also a very real possiblity. When the ground is saturated and the winds are high, the trees go down. Redwoods being the biggest trees, may look sturdy, but their roots are actually not very deep, thus in my opinion making them strong candidates for toppling over. The mear thought of which reduces me to a quivering pool of nerves at every little noise, and offering silent prayers of survival to any deity who will listen. So far it seems to be working. :) Although, I have to say, of all the trees that do fall, I've yet to see a redwood go down. Needless to say, It still scares the crap out of me.

As much as I love living with nature (In the summer, spring and fall), it's times like this when I long to live in a city of sturdy cement buildings, and puny little trees. A place where no matter what the weather is you can feel secure that the house you live in, will stay standing and continue to provide a roof over your head.

That is unless there is an earthquake...

The thrill of the ride

With the recent bout of nicer weather lately, there is no denying it's almost that time of year again. Time to push the bike out of hibernation and start that baby up.

Yes folks, riding weather is almost here. Yipee! There is something about a sunny day in the mountains that brings the bikes out in droves. They far outnumber the cars, and you can see groups of 20 or 30 of them hanging out at gas stations, overlooks, and restaurants. It's a beautiful site.

My husband and I love to ride, and the best places to go are the mountains. The roads are fun, relatively free of cars, and the scenery is exquisite.

Since we have had (not the last few days though) nice weather, we took out the beast for it's first ride of the year. And let me tell you it was sooo much fun. It was a small ride, just a couple hours exploring the mountains in our area, but it was awesome to be out again! I'd forgotten how much fun it was.

There is something about the trill of riding on a motorcycle that beats regular car traveling. Even though we travel the same roads, being on the bike gives it a whole new experience, it feels faster, you can feel the wind rushing past you in varying temperatures, the world around you seems brighter, and the smells. You can smell everything. From the various scents of nature to someone doing the laundry. Although sometimes the smells are not so pleasant (I'm thinking port a potties, skunks, and car exhaust), but it's worth every sniff.

One of my favorite riding trips (I have many) was when we took the bike from home (California) to Orcas Island, Washington. If you don't know where that is, it's pretty much in Canada.

Being able to sit on the bike for many hours at a time took some getting used to. As obviously your body is not designed to straddle an object for long periods. (get your mind out of the gutter :) ).

At first I could only go 30 miles until I needed to get off and stretch. Those first few days, I honestly thought I'd never be able to sit again. Eventually, though you get used to it, and now I can last quite a while (yeah me).

Once I was able to sit for awhile, I really began to enjoy it. It is such a free feeling zipping along the roads without a care. Even though the high winds on the coast had me praying to every deity in existence, and the biting freezing cold weather that seeps into your bones (it was summer), had me shivering uncontrollably, I wouldn't change the experience for anything. It was absolutely awesome.

A lot of people pooh pooh riding because it's dangerous, and don't get me wrong it is, but so are a lot of things. And honestly, I'd rather, experience the thrill and magic of a wonderful ride then worry about something you can't control.

When I'm on the bike, my problems disappear, and I enjoy the moment for what it is. It really is a natural high, and at that point, it seems as if anything is possible.

This is the bike we have. A BMW Dakar F650. This particular picture is not ours though. I found it on Flicker and saw it was available for download so I did. (Thank you!)

Wal Mart to offer Medical Services?

It's true I just read an article saying that Wal Mart plans to put walk-in medical clinics in their stores. That's right pretty soon, you can get your very own Mc-checkup at your nearest Wal Mart location.

Hmm... I don't know what to think about this. For me it's kind of a scary thought. I mean going to the doctor while shopping at Wal Mart? A store that is known for their cheap products and shifty labor conditions. It just doesn't sound right. I'm afraid the medical services they offer would equal that of their products, i.e. low quality. Although I do frequent the store myself, because I'm not above buying low quality rugs for my bathroom etc. I just don't want to compromise my health care. Apparently Wal Mart is affiliated with certain hospitals, but still you have to wonder about the medical professional who feels it's ok to offer their services at a discount store.

On the other hand I suppose this could be a good thing. Especially if their services are cheap/affordable (but still of good quality), then it might be nice for the people who don't have medical insurance or even the elderly. Especially when getting around may be a problem and they could shop for their weekly needs and get a checkup at the same place. If one had to choose between not being able to afford regular medical care and a Wal Mart clinic who's services were within your budget, than I could see where that would work out.

Still it's a strange world we live in, when you can pick up kitty litter and get your bladder infection checked out all at the same store.

Very strange indeed.

Be Still My Beating Heart ... Indiana Jones is Back!!

The other day my hubby and I went to see The Spiderwick Chronicles. Very cool movie by the way.

Anyway, while the previews were rolling, I was doing my usual ritual of situating my food stuff, eating popcorn, and unpacking my peanut butter cups for quick, easy access, (a very important task I'll have you know), when all of a sudden I heard the familiar strains of a song that has been very close to my heart since childhood. Da da da DA! My head popped up like a spring, popcorn frozen halfway to my mouth, images of the Holy Grail and the Ark of the Convenant flashed on the screen. I knew those images. They were ... Indiana Jones! I'm telling you I almost peed my pants with excitement. Yes, I was watching the preview for the new movie, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull coming May 22nd to a theater near you!

Oh praise the Hollywood gods that be! This is such a joyous occasion. I have loved these movies ever since Raiders of the Lost Ark first came out, and I was just an impressionable little tyke. If it wasn't for Indiana Jones, I wouldn't have been introduced to the exciting world of treasure hunting (haven't found any yet), finding old bones(found lots of those), etc. And I can proudly say that because of Indiana, my first profession of choice was archeology with a slight hint of paleontology. The subject is still dear and exciting to me, but I realized early on that this particular science, really wasn't a good career choice if one wants to a. make money and b. have a family (what with all the traveling to dig sites). Besides, I don't like hot weather, and every picture I have ever seen of an archaeologist depicts them sitting in the sweltering sun, digging at the dry dusty ground with a toothpick for hours on end, and maybe finding a small shard of bone or sharks tooth. Nope not for me. However that hasn't stopped me from spending many an hour exploring beaches (I was into pirates too), forests etc. in search of exciting treasures, artifacts, trinkets what have you. Which I know, makes me a big dork with a capital D. Nevertheless, this little quirk of mine, was what actually got me a first date with my now husband. But that is a story for another time.

The hours I spent imagining myself on Indiana Jones type adventures were numerous. As a child I used to swing from the swing sets, theme music playing in my head, envisioning that I was swinging through the jungles of the Amazon, with my enemies in hot pursuit, ala Indiana style. Ah, the days of youth. So pure and innocent.

It goes without saying that I am beyond excited to see this new movie (I heart you Indiana)! And I have high expectations for this next installment(I know you won't let me down). I will be there May 22nd front row and center you can count on that. Until then, I will appease my anticipation, by watching the cinematic greats Raiders, Temple of Doom, and the best of all, The Last Crusade.

Right now though, I'm off to unpack my bullwhip, dust off my fedora, and put on my leather jacket, watch out world, my inner-explorer has been unleashed!

Keyboard, garbage, and stinky neighbors?

I'm happy to report that my keyboard situation is much better. Hooray! Yes I am getting used to the flatness. The flatness and I are now one. Good. Maybe I can finally throw away the box now.

My garbage situation however, has not improved. It is now going on three weeks without recycling or yard waste bins. Not sure what went wrong. Whether or not the neighbors snagged them, or the garbage company just forgot us. Did finally call them and they promised to send the bins out on Monday. Hmmm... Well see.

Talking about trash reminds me of my neighbors. Because honestly, the two years I have lived here, they have not put their garbage out once! I shudder to think of what they are doing with their refuse, but it definitely isn't making it to the curb every Thursday. Since I live in the mountains, it is not uncommon for people to burn their trash. However, this cannot be the case for our neighbors, for a couple of reasons, 1. You can only burn during certain times of the year, (obviously). If they did burn their trash surly there would be a mountain of it stinking up the yard during the months you can't burn right? But there isn't. And 2. the one time they did burn (whether or not it was trash I don't know) they started a fire and the fire department had to come and put it out. Not very comforting when living next door to these folks, especially since the other fire we had in the neighborhood was next door to them and they work at the fire department! Being a fireman, one would think that he would know better than to put ashes (that had not cooled off) from the fireplace into a bag and then set it in the yard. Imagine his embarrassment when needing to call the fire department to put out the fire. Wonder if he still works there?

Back to the neighbors. If they don't burn their trash, and don't put it out for collection, what the hell are they doing with it? Living with it? Is the house littered with reeking rubbish? If so, shouldn't we smell it when walking past their abode? And since they aren't the nicest folks in town, what with the fact that whenever I try to say hi to the weird scary mountain man who prefers to live under the house instead of in it, he never acknowledges my presence verbally, but instead, just stares in a very creepy sort of way, well, I'm sort of hesitant to ask.

It's all very strange and puzzling, but I think the important thing to address here is, why do I even care?

The good ol days

What happened to Hollywood? Remember the days when Hollywood was prestigious and glamorous? No? Well neither do I actually, but I wish I did. You see I have long felt that I was born in the wrong decade. Especially when it comes to movies and t.v.
Now, don't get me wrong I'm actually glad I was born when I was, because well hey, I'm still alive. But when it comes to entertainment, I have always preferred the classics. Which makes me feel a little like a freak in this day and age of reality t.v., and huge mega blockbusters. Blind Date or I Love Lucy? LUCY please!

Just for the record, I do like the modern stuff. There are lots of shows and movies I love and own. (I heart you Frasier!!!) And while I'm on the subject of television, what ever happened to good ol fashioned sitcoms? (Am I watching the wrong channels?) Why has reality tv taken over? I know I'm kind of out of the loop, but I just don't understand the appeal. I want to see fantasy, comedy, not people thrown together on a desert island to see who will cheat on their spouses. Unless of course it's Gilligan's Island. (Mr. Howell didn't cheat on Luvvy with Ginger or Mary Ann).

My obsession with the old days, has been a source of much frustration when it's time to pick a movie to watch with my husband. While he would rather watch dark drama, I want to see comedy classics with Bob Hope. (Although he has introduced me to the world of Tim Burton and Johnny Depp for which I'm grateful.) Going to the video store is a major time consuming chore as we stand staring a hundreds of movies trying to find just one we can both agree on. On the plus side he can now recognize songs from My Fair Lady and put names to the faces of such greats as Cary Grant and Audrey Hepburn. I'm so proud!

But seriously, my problem is this. The classics of yesteryear were simple and fun. Good old fashioned entertainment. With crazy comedy antics and romantic love stories. The actors were fully clothed and sex scenes were non existent. Sure they alluded to sex, but you never saw it. And that's ok. Why? Because it's part of the thrill. The anticipation of whether or not they will get it on. It leaves a bit of mystery. Sure you want them to get together but you don't want to actually see it. Audrey Hepburn or Cary Grant wouldn't never flash their unmentionables on camera. (Sometimes there is such a thing as too much information folks.)
They were role models. Glamorous, exciting, suave and classy. Does anyone really want to see June and Ward Cleaver getting busy between the sheets? No. So why should it change for today? I know I'm sounding like the biggest prude, and someone who might be actually 83 instead of 33 years old, but I have a feeling I may not be the only one out there who thinks the same way especially women.

If anybody actually reads this blog, (Ha!) I may get some shit for this, but I'm going to say it anyway. (since no one going to read it :) )

The entertainment business? Is way out of control. At what point did it become ok to to bring the red light district into our adverage television and movie consumption. Not exactly hard core, but some of the content on these programs borders on soft porn. Sex sells. Yes it does. But other things do too, and honestly can't we tone it down a notch? If I wanted to see nudity and porn well I can just log on to the internet or buy a movie. It should be a choice, not mandatory viewing every time you watch a movie or t.v. show. Are Victoria's Secret commercials with pencil thin models simpering around in skimpy bras and panties really necessary? Save it for the catalogs. I don't need to have those aneroxic trophies on my television while I'm trying to watch some decent programming and eat my caloric infused pizza. Mmmmmm. Yummy. (Had to throw that in) Do we really need to see all the naughty bits of every actress who stares in a movie these days? And if so, what about a little equality? Why are there always only butt shots of men, and yet it's perfectly ok to show women fully exposed? If we have to watch it, give the women something to look at too. And what about children? They are being exposed to this also. Kids watch movies and television just like the rest of us (duh), and no it isn't always between the hours of 6am and 10 am. when the cartoons are on. They watch it at night too, and even when you are watching a fairly benign station like TBS which shows mostly reruns of older shows, you are still bombarded with commercials for sex lubricant, condoms, and yes those dreaded VS models. I haven't even touched on what it does to the self esteem of women. (eating disorders anyone?) Who are primarly shown as sex objects and as an image of beauty that besides being physically unattainable by 95 % of the population (Marilyn was size 12 people!), it is downright impossible without the aid of airbrushing, and Furthermore! ... Well you know what I'm getting it, and I'm running off on a separate tangent, so I'll stop. My point? The classics were pure and fun. Let's have some of that back.


Please Hollywood show a little decency and respect. Leave a little mystery and anticipation. It gives our minds something to think about, and that is actually a very powerful tool.

End of sermon.

Keyboard update

It's too flat. It now takes me 3 times a long to type as my fingers keep traveling to the wrong keys, because I can't bloody feel them properly. However, my cat is now able to type much faster as he can now easily lay is fat body across the board and push all the buttons at once.

Oh and that special way cool button that I so much admired? Doesn't work. Apparently it only works with the newer operating systems which of course I don't have. Grrrrrr!

Why do you hate us?

Dear Department of Sanitation,

I would like to know why you saw fit, to take away our recycle and yard waste bins? What is something we did? Since this event has occurred two weeks ago, we have been without a proper way to dispose of our recyclables and Christmas tree. I do however want to thank you for the very shiny new garbage can we received last Thursday. I have to admit that after the stunt you pulled with the other bins, I was hesitant to put out my trash for pickup this past week, especially when I saw that it too had disappeared. Bastards! I thought. But then had to retract my curses when I saw the nice shiny new gray bin arrive in it's place a hour later. So thank you again. Even though the new one isn't as big as the previous brown one, I'm sure you have special reasons for that decision, that are unrelated to the fact that you could make more money from us, if we needed to purchase a bigger can in order to fit in all our damn garbage! But I digress, like I said, we have no way to dispose of our waste in an earth friendly matter such as was the original intent of the recycling plan. Because of this we are forced to fill up our tiny trash bin (thank you again :) ), even faster than usual because the recycling is very bulky. As a result, the garbage in the house is over flowing at an alarming rate, and I fear a possible cockroach or worse rodent infestation. Please, in all that is sanitary what are you going to do to put my fears at ease? And the trash in it's proper place?

Sincerely,

Michele (Loyal customer since March 2006)

Adventures in keyboard shopping

So this past week, my husband has taken it upon himself, (I'm not complaining) to update my computers. (one Mac laptop and a PC desktop which can be hooked up to work together. I like the bigger screen on my desktop computer). Anyway, after finishing this task, I decided I needed new accessories to go with my now fancy updated equipment. My last item to be purchased to make my desk complete was a new keyboard. Pretty standard.

Our adventure started out when my husband and I made the trek to the closest Apple store, because they usually have pretty accessories. Think color. Upon entering the store I found that they only have 3 kinds of keyboards. The newest one, was on prominent display at every computer terminal. The prices were reasonable, about $50 which is good as we are trying to make an effort to cut back on our spending. The problem? It's flat. I mean really flat. I know this is the new style, but I'm just not used to not being able to feel the keys as I type. Call me old fashioned, but that's the way I am. The other issue was they didn't have any pretty colors. (note to Apple computer, this is a very good idea). What happened to the cool clear ones, that had color around the edges? In case you haven't noticed, I like color, and my room reflects this part of my personality disorder, I mean trait, as the first thing you notice are the bright orange and hot pink walls. Not the paint choices for everyone I know, but I like a nice cherry warm feel to my rooms. Needless to say I was less than enthused with Apple's choices. So we had no choice but to go to Fry's, the closest store that has computer accessories.

First I have to mention that most of the time I loathe going to Fry's especially with my husband. (This is also true for any computer/hardware store. Home Depot anyone? ) Why? Because he can stay in that store for hours looking at various gadgets and electronic toys, all of which he doesn't actually need, while I trail along, trying unsuccessfully to stear him towards the checkout line. So, even though I really wanted a cool new keyboard I was very hesitant to go. Finally after much deliberation (and lunch) I agreed. This is what happened...

Fry's Electronics Parking Lot:

Me: Okay so we are just going in to see if they have a cool keyboard right?

Hubby: Yes.

Me: There isn't anything else you want or need?

Hubby: Nope.

Me: That means we can go straight in and get the keyboard and leave right?

Hubby: Absolutely.

Me: Okay let's do this.

We walk into the store with me leading the way, like I know exactly where to the keyboard section is, but in actual reality, do not have a clue. We are walking down the main isle when a pretty pink display catches my eye. Stop to admire nice pretty computer accessories, including, can it be? A pink laptop? Oh I have to have one of those, that is too cool. Inspect laptop. Hmmm. Not actually pink, just display background reflecting on shiny metal . Well that's actually a good thing. We shouldn't be spending hundreds of dollars on stuff we don't actually need. Crisis adverted. Move on to next aisle. Yes this looks like the right area, I'm sure the keyboards are down here... OH WOW! Look at that pink leopard print mouse! I didn't know they made cool designs like that. Oh and look at that one with the flowers..

Me: (pointing eagerly at mouse) "Honey? Can I get that pink leopard print mouse"?

Hubby: "You have a pink mouse at home that you just bought two days ago".

Me: "Oh". ( whoops I forgot about that) "But that one is just plain pink, look how cool this is".

Hubby: "Very cool. But you don't need it, and it won't work with your computer".

Me: "Why not"?

Hubby: "Cause it's not wireless".

Me: (So?) "Okay fine".

Stare wistfully at mouse that I will never ever own, because of mean husband. After a few moments, turn attention back to task at hand. Keyboards. Ick. All the keyboards are black. What is the deal with black anyway? They have 35 different styles and all are black. These are way to ugly to be displayed in my room. There must be something else.

Hubby: "Hey they have the Mac keyboard here and it's 3 dollars cheaper".

Me: "I'm not sure about that one, it's too flat".

Hubby: "Well which one do you want"?

Me: "None they're all ugly. Let's go". I turn and make for the exit.

Hubby: " Are you sure? What about this one"?

Hubby holds up different keyboard that I somehow passed over, which is amazingly not in black.

Me: " Hmmm..." Inspect keyboard. "Yeah, this is kinda cool, let's get it".

Hubby: (Frowning as he scrutinizes keyboard) "No this one won't work, it doesn't have the blah, blah, blah".

Me: "Okay".

At this point I go back to the Mac keyboard which is the only decent looking one, and reconsider it's flatness. The problem is I'm too lazy to go to another store and really this the only one that isn't totally dorky looking. I'm sure the other stores will just have a bunch of the same stuff. Plus It has that nifty little button on it, that will allow me to bring up my dashboard instantly. Way cool.

Me: "Okay I'll get the Mac one".

Hubby: "Are you positive"?

Me: "Yes". Have sudden feeling that will be experiencing buyers remorse later tonight.

Finally we are walking toward the checkout. By way of the CD aisle. Try to take secret glances at CD's as we walk, because I could really use some new music. Just lingering ever so slightly at the soundtrack section when hubby draws my attention by asking if we should get a dance pad for our Wii. Now there's a thought. That would be cool. I could get my jam on, and use it as a form of exercise all while playing a game. Okay let's get one. We make our way to the Wii section where I locate the nearest employee who looks to be all of 13 years old.

Me: "Excuse me?"

13 yr old turns and stares.

Me: "Is there a dance pad for the Wii"?

13 yr old: "Yes".

Stare expectantly waiting for him to show me where it is. Blank stares from 13 yr old.

Me: "Ummm.. Do you have it"?

13 yr old wanders over to display two feet away and hands me box.

Me: "Thank you"!

13 yr old, still staring like a deer in the headlights. Okay, he's a little weird. Why doesn't he say something, or move on and do some work? Whatever. Take dance pad and show to hubby, and make to leave the Wii section, at which point I exclaim loudly while pushing 13 yr old to the side,

"Oh look they have Bomberman"!! I love that game, we have to get it".

Hubby: "It looks lame".

Me: "Are you kidding? This was the coolest game, next to Zelda of course. This isn't the original game, but I'm sure it's loads of fun".

Hubby: "Still think it looks stupid".

Me: "Ha! Just wait til you play it mister".

Just in case though, decide to look at back description again. Wow, it does look kinda lame. No real adventure game with cool worlds and levels, just a bunch of mini games. Rats. I put game back sadly, but grab Pirates of the Caribbean to make up for it. Lucky me, Pirates passes with hubby, so I get to keep it. Ha!

Hubby: "What about Lara Croft? This looks fun".

Stealthily pull Ratatouille off shelf and secretly place it in stack under Pirates. Feign interest in Lara Croft for a minute, while hubby looks at more games. Hand it back saying if he wants it we can get it. Turn back to study games again, when hubby pointing to my stack of games asks,

"What have you got there"?

Me: "Nothing". I Turn away so he can't get to my stash.

Hubby: "Seriously what game is that"? He grabs for the games, but I squirt away triumphantly. "Did you put Bomberman in there"?

Me: "Noooo".

Hubby: "Well what is it"?

Reluctantly I hold up Ratatouille. A small disagreement ensues, but he agrees to get it. Score! After spending ages more looking over games we decide to claim our purchases and actually make it to the checkout. When the cashier announces our total of $230, I'm slightly shocked.

Me: "You know, we should have bought that keyboard at the Apple store".

Hubby: "Why is that"?

Me: "Because it would have saved us money".

Hubby? "What are you talking about, it was cheaper here, we saved three dollars".

Yeah, our 15 minute shopping spree for a $50 keyboard turned into an hour and a half and we spent $180 extra. This folks, is why we should never ever shop together. Neither on of us has control and we both get distracted easily. Lesson learned? Probably not.